Bathroom ‘Reality’ Check

days2 copyI have often believed that sharing ones story is the most powerful way you can possibly help others, but there are certain topics that have been for much of my life far too painful to talk about, but after a disgusting Facebook post about why the so-called bathroom bills in North Carolina are so obviously necessary, I realized that I could no longer keep silent about the bullshit boogie man tactic that North Carolina and other places are using to make trans people seem like we’re out to attack someone in the bathroom. Let me tell you a little story.


When I was eight years old, I was molested by my neighbor who was also my baby sitter at the time. We went to the police, and he did in fact go free because it was his word against mine. For years nothing happened, then, out of the blue almost two years ago, my mother and I got a letter informing us that I had come up in an old file somewhere in So-Cal regarding him and they were bringing a case against him after almost fifteen years.

It took almost another two years for the case to finally be put to bed and some very very dark and traumatic memories being dragged to the surface like adding salt to a gaping flesh wound. But here I stand, for all the world to see. A trans woman, who actually was sexually assaulted as a child, not in a public bathroom mind, but that’s not the point.

The point is, it happens, and it’s rarely if ever some stranger in a bathroom. Nor is it likely to be some man claiming to be transgender. The hilarious part is that these people don’t have any idea what being transgender is or what it means. Trans people have existed forever and guess what we’ve been using public restrooms forever, don’t you think if this was a thing we would have heard about it ever in your life? Just because you don’t know someone is trans doesn’t mean that they aren’t. And chances are you probably won’t notice because spoiler alert trans women don’t actually look like the above picture. It’s shameful that we’ve come to this point but if you think passing some bill like this is going to stop things like this from happening you clearly have no idea about trans people or the people who are victims of sexual assault.

In the words of Ms. Latrice Royale, “Five G’s please, Good God Get a Grip Girl.”

Trans people aren’t some boogie man and honestly this nonsense NEEDS to stop. Because there are real lives of real people at stake, not fictitious scenarios of shit that hasn’t happened.

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