The other day, as often happens on YouTube, I was watching a video from one of my favorite YouTuber’s and I came across a suggested video entitled: Why I decided to De-transition. I was, curious. I knew that it was something that people decided to do, but I also knew the so-called ‘reasons’ often suggested for why people decided to de-transition are often toxic and worse than that, completely false, hence the title I’ve chosen here. Because while de-transitioning is a very real thing, it’s important to realize there’s a lot of misinformation spread, mostly by anti-trans groups, who believe that they know the real reason, and they obviously know more than the actual people who make this decision.
The irony being, they themselves, are part of the reason, people decide to de-transition.
Transitioning, is a very emotional process, becoming the person you have always known yourself to be, is emotional under the best circumstances. But for far too many in the community, the circumstances are even worse. Family and friend rejections, loss of work, loss of everything they have ever known or loved. Far too many in our community, live and work on the streets, and it can be a very scary and dangerous world out there. And even if you have support sometimes that doesn’t feel like enough, because you may have uneducated doctors in your area, ignorant people who constantly see you as something you are not, and it can be incredibly frustrating and what I saw watching that video is exactly what I have read many times from those who de-transition.
It isn’t so much that they feel they aren’t the gender they are, it’s simply that it’s too difficult, too painful to continue on, for them it would be easier to simply stop their transition, and turn back the clock than to have to face the world with the bullshit they receive on a daily basis. I find this both troubling and heartbreaking.
No one should ever feel like it’s easier to live a life that makes them unhappy, than be who they are.
This YouTuber in question, posted that video three months ago, and as far as I know hasn’t posted anything since. At the time they were about to talk to their doctor and though no official decision had been made, I can’t help but hope they decided not to go through with it.
It’s a tough road to be sure, but I have to believe it’s worth it, to be ourselves.